All right, I’m a lettin’ the steam come off the teapot here. Bunch o’ people jawin’ ‘bout Jack this n’ jack that n’ it all started with Jack ….. yer blame wrong! Jack might be the cause of it, but he sure ain’t the start of it. This internet thing din’t help none and Jack contributed plenty, but scratch yer head n’ think a spell. A whole bunch of this Jack stuff started floatin’ round when  ….. heck, Jack wus ‘bout 12 near as I recon then in the early 1970’s, gittin’ in all sorts of trouble. Back then, people seemed ta think it funny to yell his name ‘cross the street ‘er in a parkin’ lot … admit it wus kinda funny at the time … n’ this whole know Jack Schitt thing started rumblin’. Then seems the innernet got ta goin’ n’ these ‘MEME’ things started poppin’ up all over the place tryin’ ta be funny … people seem’d ta think it’s cute the holler “ya don’t know Jack Schitt” as time went. Nary a one of ‘em knew him but that didn’t seem ta stop ‘em.

Then, the Email craze took over n’ next thing ya know, there’s bunches of comments flyin’ back n’ forth all bothered ‘bout Jack. By then, the man was into his early 40’s n’ we thought we’d heard it all by that time. You’d think thirty some years of people jawin’ bout Jack would be enough BUT NO! – Seems it hadn’t stopped since. If’n all ya want is that internet gremlin … what they call it … a meme now, ‘er whatever ya call so-called word play pun-based parody … like this here family is a parody …. My Behind. Heck, cousin Deep been givin’ me all kinds a words n’ ‘xcuses, like a goat ain’t a goat! Go git yer kicks outta that stuff if’n ya want. Sometimes ya jus gotta call ‘em like ya see ‘em. We’ve never claimed we know’d the gospel truth … but it’s sure funny how 15 dern years inta their marriage Noe has a knock-down drag-out fight with Jack n’ everyone swears they done split ….. justice o’ the peace says THAT din’t happen till 29 years, a fryin pan, a barn n’ a goat. Yea – N’ it WAS a knock-down drag out … Noe dun about hictched him ta the tractor n’ was fixin’ ta haul him out ta the fields fer that one! Noe got the old Farmall fired on the third try. It objected loudly, backfired once hard enough to concern the chickens, and might’ve accomplished the extraction had Arnie and Mabel not taken up positions directly ahead. Lucky fer Jack Arnie n’ Mabel jus wouldn’t budge outta the way n’ let Noe go, still hear her cussin’ them darn goats! Don’t recall Jack made it to supper, took him a while to git unhitched, n’ truth be told, he wus safer with that tractor then back in the house. Funny thing is: nay a one of us can recall ‘xactly WHAT started it, we jus’ saw what ended it.

Maybe, eventually, the grandkids ‘il live it down ….

Archive Note: Arnie and Mabel are known to have been goats. No further documentation has presently been located.